You can’t make someone do what you want. You have to make them want to do it.
Where people go wrong is they get frustrated when people don’t do what they want. They make it mean something about themselves and take offense. In the end, they make it impossible for things to work out.
I found myself in a situation where my team was having trouble getting integrated to support projects in which we had an integral role. Many of my colleagues were frustrated that the technicians weren’t inviting us to meetings. Our recurring complaint was, “We don’t even have a seat at the table”. Thinking that thought and feeling frustrated had us focused on our lack of control and kept us from identifying solutions for a way forward. We definitely weren’t getting any closer to achieving the project goal.
So, I took an alternate approach. I was going to catch more flies with honey! I began dropping in on the lead technician for my project almost daily to develop a relationship. I would ask questions about his family and his past work experiences, so that I could get to know him on a personal level. Once we had that connection, naturally he wanted to include me. I also found that by being in his office each day, I would just so happen to be at the right place at the right time when an impromptu meeting of the minds popped up.
All too often, we think people are intentionally leaving us out. We find reasons, like they want all of the credit or they don’t value our input. But the reality is, people are busy, and things can slip through the cracks. If you take the time to nurture relationships at work, you’ll likely get your seat at the table because they want you there.
If you’d like to discuss your work relationships, book a free 30 minute call with me.